Do you find it hard at times to do what you know you should do? Or to not do what you know you shouldn't? Either one, I find it hard. For I am carnal, sold under sin. There are many things I realised I should be doing. And there are things which I realised I should stop doing. But too often, I push it to tomorrow. And too often, tomorrow never comes. I learnt a lesson lately - that if you tell yourself "Alright, Clarence, this would be the last time," or "Alright, Clarence, I'll do it tomorrow," - things will never get done. Believe that.
What's worse is, when ur mind and body speaks a different language. Your mind says, "Clarence, this is bad. No!" but your body says "Who cares, man. Go ahead. No harm done. Fun is the ultimate." Do we all experience this? I strongly believe we do. At this point, the cry of Paul echoes very deeply through my mind. In Romans, Paul said and I quote - "O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? I thank God - through Jesus Christ our Lord!"
Yes indeed, Paul was speaking for all of us. At one time or another in our lives, we all experienced this spiritual pain of being carnal, where deep down inside us, we want to follow God's laws but too often, the flesh is weak, and we yield to temptations. This, of course, seems like a no way out for us but let's take a look at what I Corinthians 10:13 says.
"No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it."
Now, see? What excuse have we to say that the temptation was too great? Or to term it in a crueler manner, what excuse have we to sin? The answer is - none. So, my friends, take heed today, for what you read here is not by chance, but by the will and grace of God.
Ah, Lord God. Thank You for Your love to me. Thank You for Your grace so free.
Amen.
Sunday, December 17, 2006
Sunday, November 05, 2006
If - Rudyard Kipling
** Take some time to read this. Great philosophy of life. **
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;
If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:.
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build'em up with worn-out tools;
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;
If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:.
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build'em up with worn-out tools;
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Chasing Cars
We'll do it all, everything, on our own.
We don't need anything, or anyone.
If I lay here, if I just lay here
Would you lie with me, and just forget the world.
I don't quite know how to say how I feel
Those three words, are said too much, they're not enough.
If I lay here, if I just lay here
Would you lie with me, and just forget the world.
Forget what we're told, before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life.
Let's waste time, chasing cars, around our heads.
I need your grace to remind me, to find my own.
If I lay here, if I just lay here
Would you lie with me, and just forget the world.
Forget what we're told, before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life.
All that I am, all that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see
I don't know where, confused about how as well
just know that these things will never change for us at all.
If I lay here, if I just lay here
Would you lie with me, and just forget the world.
We don't need anything, or anyone.
If I lay here, if I just lay here
Would you lie with me, and just forget the world.
I don't quite know how to say how I feel
Those three words, are said too much, they're not enough.
If I lay here, if I just lay here
Would you lie with me, and just forget the world.
Forget what we're told, before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life.
Let's waste time, chasing cars, around our heads.
I need your grace to remind me, to find my own.
If I lay here, if I just lay here
Would you lie with me, and just forget the world.
Forget what we're told, before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life.
All that I am, all that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see
I don't know where, confused about how as well
just know that these things will never change for us at all.
If I lay here, if I just lay here
Would you lie with me, and just forget the world.
Saturday, October 07, 2006
Shattered.
Lord, I come to You,
Let my heart be changed, renewed,
Flowing from the grace,
That I've found in You.
Lord, I've come to know,
The weaknesses I see in me,
Will be swept away,
By the power of Your love.
Hold me close,
Let Your love surround me,
Bring me near,
Draw me to Your side,
And as I wait,
I'll rise up like the eagle,
And I'll soar with You,
Your Spirit leads me on,
By the power of Your love.
Lord, unveil my eyes,
Let me see You face to face,
The knowledge of Your grace,
As You live in me.
Lord, renew my mind,
As Your will unfolds in my life,
In living everyday,
By the power of Your love.
Let my heart be changed, renewed,
Flowing from the grace,
That I've found in You.
Lord, I've come to know,
The weaknesses I see in me,
Will be swept away,
By the power of Your love.
Hold me close,
Let Your love surround me,
Bring me near,
Draw me to Your side,
And as I wait,
I'll rise up like the eagle,
And I'll soar with You,
Your Spirit leads me on,
By the power of Your love.
Lord, unveil my eyes,
Let me see You face to face,
The knowledge of Your grace,
As You live in me.
Lord, renew my mind,
As Your will unfolds in my life,
In living everyday,
By the power of Your love.
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
Friday, September 22, 2006
Sonnet 0125656707
Fine morning,
Birds were singing,
Smooth sailing,
They were laughing.
Mutual attraction,
Strong affection,
Love in action,
Near perfection.
A sudden storm,
Killed the norm,
The reigning storm,
Marred the form.
Laughter ceased,
Conversations missed,
Hostility increased,
In silence hissed.
Nobody understands,
How love transcends,
Through the rain,
Though in vain.
~shake-ki-spear~
22 September 2006
** product of extreme boredom during lessons.
Birds were singing,
Smooth sailing,
They were laughing.
Mutual attraction,
Strong affection,
Love in action,
Near perfection.
A sudden storm,
Killed the norm,
The reigning storm,
Marred the form.
Laughter ceased,
Conversations missed,
Hostility increased,
In silence hissed.
Nobody understands,
How love transcends,
Through the rain,
Though in vain.
~shake-ki-spear~
22 September 2006
** product of extreme boredom during lessons.
Sunday, September 03, 2006
The Cry Of Desperation
For we know that the law is spiritual, but I am carnal, sold under sin. For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do. If, then, I do what I will not to do, I agree with the law that it is good. But now, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me. For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh) nothing good dwells; for to will is present with me, but how to perform what is good I do not find. For the good that I will to do, I do not do; but the evil I will not to do, that I practice. Now if I do what I will not to do, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me.
I find then a law, that evil is present with me, the one who wills to do good. For I delight in the law of God according to the inward man. But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? I thank God - through Jesus Christ our Lord!
So then, with the mind I myself serve the law of God, but with the flesh the law of sin.
Romans 7 : 14 - 25
I find then a law, that evil is present with me, the one who wills to do good. For I delight in the law of God according to the inward man. But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? I thank God - through Jesus Christ our Lord!
So then, with the mind I myself serve the law of God, but with the flesh the law of sin.
Romans 7 : 14 - 25
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Random Moderate Ordinary Post
I have nothing to write about, I have no inspiration, no, nothing. Yet, I just wanted to post something and write something out of nothing. But having nothing in my mind makes it hard for me to write something. I'm trying, so bear with me as you read this post. Somehow, life has been quite different. Form 6 wasn't what I expected it to be. It's full of surprises, pleasant, unpleasant ones. Updates bout me - my hair got longer, my nails got longer, my brains got weaker. It's really tough trying to catch up in the Arts streams. People are mad there. Either they are too hardworking or they are just mad. You wouldn't want an elaboration. Anyhow, I would end this post with this - I had enough of everything, so I'm going to take a break which I needed since milleniums ago. Yes, drama will be over soon. Ah, the joy of it. Let's pray life will be brighter. I'm sure it would be.
-random gibberish-
-random gibberish-
Friday, June 30, 2006
Bruce Lee : A "Longer" Version
Aloha people! This is Bruce Lee!
Bruce Lee trying out some kung-fu
Bruce Lee with his infamous long neck stance
He's photogenic isn't he?
Watcha!
Clear view of Bruce Lee snapping at the filter
Obviously he's kinda angry with being caught up
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
DotA : Tak Nak?
DotA : Tak Nak
Some would feel the excitement whenever this word is mentioned. Some would feel disgusted upon hearing it. Some (very special cases) would even feel high, so high that even their friends can feel it. Still, some would be completety against it, even to the extent of scolding others. Well, the name is none other than - DotA.
Before I go any further, allow me to give you a brief (and when I say brief, I mean it) explanation on DotA. DotA stands for Defence of the Ancients. One of the most creative, inovative, and addictive game in the 21st Century. Yet, why are there so many who are against it? What's wrong? There used to be a saying, "Laughter, the best medicine". Well, NOT anymore. Let me introduce you to a new one - "DotA, the best medicine". Oh yea, not exactly true, but it makes sense doesn't it?
I confess I am addicted to this game. I can spend all my time just talking about it with fellow DotA players and not feel bored. What pisses me off is that people would scold me for talking about DotA. These people would be those non-DotA players and my mom. My girlfriend would scold me cause she knows I'm obssessed. Well, I would retaliate very badly and that would be scolding her in return. I'm evil??
But the question here is, what's wrong with you people? If you can't appreciate this game, just shut up and let others enjoy talking about it. What's it got to do with you? I'm not scolding my girlfriend nor my mom here alright. They are excused any time for scolding me whatsoever. What I'm trying to point out here is that you have no right to stop anyone from playing or even talking about DotA. Freedom of choice is what makes us special.
Anyway, I know being addicted to some worldly thing is wrong and it's against my faith. DotA has somehow become something like an idol (but not quite one yet) in my life. That would be a sin for God said in the Bible that we shall have no other gods before him. Idolatry is sin. Therefore, DotA, if abused, would be sin too. Good news is, I'm trying to stop here. So anyone can lend a hand if you want BUT (now look at that BUT very closely) don't stop me from doing what I want. You can advise me alright but if advice not taken, let me lead myself to destruction.
Guess I'm done. It would be a long story if I were to go on. I would just end with this. I would like to know, what are your opinions about DotA? How many of you think that DotA is good/evil in one way or another? And how many of you are actually addicted to this game? Yes, I see those hands. Thank you.
~out~
Saturday, June 24, 2006
The Haunting Sonata
I'm comin' home, I've done my time
Now I've got to know what is or isn't mine
If you received my letter telling you I'd soon be free
Then you'll know just what to do
If you still want me
If you still want me
Oh, tie a yellow ribbon 'round the old oak tree
It's been three long years
Do you still want me? (still want me)
If I don't see a ribbon 'round the old oak tree
I'll stay on the bus
Forget about us
Put the blame on me
If I don't see a yellow ribbon 'round the old oak tree
Now the whole damned bus is cheerin'
And I can't believe I see
A hundred yellow ribbons 'round the old oak tree
(Tie a ribbon 'round the old oak tree)
(Tie a ribbon 'round the old oak tree)
(Tie a ribbon 'round the old oak tree)
(Tie a ribbon 'round the old oak tree)
Now I've got to know what is or isn't mine
If you received my letter telling you I'd soon be free
Then you'll know just what to do
If you still want me
If you still want me
Oh, tie a yellow ribbon 'round the old oak tree
It's been three long years
Do you still want me? (still want me)
If I don't see a ribbon 'round the old oak tree
I'll stay on the bus
Forget about us
Put the blame on me
If I don't see a yellow ribbon 'round the old oak tree
Now the whole damned bus is cheerin'
And I can't believe I see
A hundred yellow ribbons 'round the old oak tree
(Tie a ribbon 'round the old oak tree)
(Tie a ribbon 'round the old oak tree)
(Tie a ribbon 'round the old oak tree)
(Tie a ribbon 'round the old oak tree)
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
When Joy Comes Flooding In
Oh, well, from the title itself, this post has got something to do with joy. And before I start, joy shall be defined. According to the Oxford Advanced Learner's Dictionary ( apologies to Cheng Fai for plagiarizing his infamous quote ), joy is defined as a feeling of great happiness or a person/thing that causes you to feel very happy.
Indeed, I'm full of joy. "Why?" would be the question in your mind right now. Alright, it may sound silly to you and I know it would but it's completely the truth. On Sunday, when I came back from church, I found a dog ( puppy ) outside my house. It's not like I've never seen a dog before but I'm just 100% attracted to animals (please don't get me wrong, the attraction I have for female humans and animals are different). I'm currently keeping it but too bad, I'm not going to rare it because I already have a dog. This is my first joy.
My second joy would be a thing. I've gotten myself a new handphone! Oh, yea, it's Samsung D820, the slide phone which is only 15.2 mm thick. Haha! Gone are all my troubles! I spent about half a year bearing with the cursed Motorola phone which gave me more trouble than I could ask for. Interested to see the photo of it? Go check it out yourself lah ~ haha.
Well, on to the serious part. God is really, really great. You might wonder how God is related to all my non-sensical joy but let me assure you that He is. My parents once said that we ( my siblings and I ) would not get a handphone until we go for our tertiary education. That rule was implemented on all my siblings except for me. I prayed to God for a handphone when I was in Form 4. And sure enough, I got what I prayed for. I know you may be thinking, "What the crap, man, you PRAYED for those things?" but all I can say is I did. I was using a Nokia 1100 at that time and many of my friends are using "cekap" phones. Due to my greedy and covetous nature, I began to be unsatisfied. So, I prayed another prayer asking for a colour phone this time. God answered my prayer through my aunty. She stays in US and handphones are free over there. And so, I got myself a Samsung E630C, a slide phone. Well, the phone did not last long and it lived for only a year. Somehow, I managed to get a Motorola phone from my cousin. That phone was oh-so stylish and cool BUT the features were like, you know. Don't judge a book by its cover. And this being my third phone, I could not complain anymore. I thought that I had to live the rest of my life ( or at least for a long time ) using this phone.
Well, throughout the years, I've changed a little and so I stopped praying for things like handphones. This time, I tried and succeeded in being contented with the Motorola phone. Even so, the greedy and covetous nature would sometime surface again and prompt me to ask my mom for a new phone. But my mom, being the firm and sensible woman that she is, did not give in to my demands. And yet, God was so gracious that when I came back from RBS, my mom suggested that I change my phone. This was because she noticed and also experienced the "lousyness" of the Motorola phone. But of course, nothing is free in this world ( except for salvation ) and there was a price to pay - in cash. I had to fish out a large amount of dough ( $$$ ) for this new phone even though my mom relieved me of half the price. Still, God is really a great God, isn't He? He answers not only your said prayers but your unsaid prayers as well. He knows our needs.
Let us take a journey into God's Word.
"Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? Therefore do not be anxious, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. "Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.
Matthew 6:25 - 34
Amen.
Well the dog story would be another long story but hey, I'm an expertise in cutting everything short. To summarize the story, it would be that my mom hates dogs and I love dogs. She wouldn't let me rare one but somehow I got one. Well, she grew to like dogs a little more but still she dislikes them. And somehow again, I'm keeping two now even though I'll have to give one away later. Oh well, temporary joy would be better than joyless right? Indeed God has blessed me with countless of things. God is great and God is good.
P/S : Yea, I'm gloating over my dog and my phone. So, here are some photos of them.
My new dog, Koala Bear.
My new phone, currently unnamed.
If you think this post is total rubbish, get lost and don't read my blog. I'm rude, so what?
Indeed, I'm full of joy. "Why?" would be the question in your mind right now. Alright, it may sound silly to you and I know it would but it's completely the truth. On Sunday, when I came back from church, I found a dog ( puppy ) outside my house. It's not like I've never seen a dog before but I'm just 100% attracted to animals (please don't get me wrong, the attraction I have for female humans and animals are different). I'm currently keeping it but too bad, I'm not going to rare it because I already have a dog. This is my first joy.
My second joy would be a thing. I've gotten myself a new handphone! Oh, yea, it's Samsung D820, the slide phone which is only 15.2 mm thick. Haha! Gone are all my troubles! I spent about half a year bearing with the cursed Motorola phone which gave me more trouble than I could ask for. Interested to see the photo of it? Go check it out yourself lah ~ haha.
Well, on to the serious part. God is really, really great. You might wonder how God is related to all my non-sensical joy but let me assure you that He is. My parents once said that we ( my siblings and I ) would not get a handphone until we go for our tertiary education. That rule was implemented on all my siblings except for me. I prayed to God for a handphone when I was in Form 4. And sure enough, I got what I prayed for. I know you may be thinking, "What the crap, man, you PRAYED for those things?" but all I can say is I did. I was using a Nokia 1100 at that time and many of my friends are using "cekap" phones. Due to my greedy and covetous nature, I began to be unsatisfied. So, I prayed another prayer asking for a colour phone this time. God answered my prayer through my aunty. She stays in US and handphones are free over there. And so, I got myself a Samsung E630C, a slide phone. Well, the phone did not last long and it lived for only a year. Somehow, I managed to get a Motorola phone from my cousin. That phone was oh-so stylish and cool BUT the features were like, you know. Don't judge a book by its cover. And this being my third phone, I could not complain anymore. I thought that I had to live the rest of my life ( or at least for a long time ) using this phone.
Well, throughout the years, I've changed a little and so I stopped praying for things like handphones. This time, I tried and succeeded in being contented with the Motorola phone. Even so, the greedy and covetous nature would sometime surface again and prompt me to ask my mom for a new phone. But my mom, being the firm and sensible woman that she is, did not give in to my demands. And yet, God was so gracious that when I came back from RBS, my mom suggested that I change my phone. This was because she noticed and also experienced the "lousyness" of the Motorola phone. But of course, nothing is free in this world ( except for salvation ) and there was a price to pay - in cash. I had to fish out a large amount of dough ( $$$ ) for this new phone even though my mom relieved me of half the price. Still, God is really a great God, isn't He? He answers not only your said prayers but your unsaid prayers as well. He knows our needs.
Let us take a journey into God's Word.
"Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? Therefore do not be anxious, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. "Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.
Matthew 6:25 - 34
Amen.
Well the dog story would be another long story but hey, I'm an expertise in cutting everything short. To summarize the story, it would be that my mom hates dogs and I love dogs. She wouldn't let me rare one but somehow I got one. Well, she grew to like dogs a little more but still she dislikes them. And somehow again, I'm keeping two now even though I'll have to give one away later. Oh well, temporary joy would be better than joyless right? Indeed God has blessed me with countless of things. God is great and God is good.
P/S : Yea, I'm gloating over my dog and my phone. So, here are some photos of them.
My new dog, Koala Bear.
My new phone, currently unnamed.
If you think this post is total rubbish, get lost and don't read my blog. I'm rude, so what?
Monday, May 08, 2006
Uncommonly Common
People : You got a blog?
Clarence : Uh..yea?
People : I've seen it before.
Clarence : Uh..yea?
People : But how come you didn't update it ar?
Clarence : Uh..hahaha..uh..yea..
I'd been through this dialogue so many a times that I made it a point to do something about it. So here's a new post. Cheers ~
Clarence : Uh..yea?
People : I've seen it before.
Clarence : Uh..yea?
People : But how come you didn't update it ar?
Clarence : Uh..hahaha..uh..yea..
I'd been through this dialogue so many a times that I made it a point to do something about it. So here's a new post. Cheers ~
Monday, March 13, 2006
The Hall Of Fame Gone Wrong
I thank God, my Lord! I thank mom. I thank every single person in the world and yet not some. These are the ones that almost or could have destroyed my very future if it were not for the grace of God and some effort I made. To these people : You're excluded from my thank-list.
But, don't be discouraged. You are in another list. The hate-list. No doubt my words are harsh, but who would understand the misery of being targeted like targets for two whole years?? And to live the life I lived for such a period would be hell for any sane human. Well, at least something like hell. Telling me to shut up right now would be senseless in any sense.
And thus, the ceremony begins. The first person to be inducted into Clarence's Hall of Hate would be the infamous pants-pulling, jokes-cracking, table-thumping and words-slurring son of a gun - Ng Yi Sung. Apart from looking sleepy all the time, this guy's a GREAT Physics teacher. Oh, yea! Believe that! His well-known feats includes making a fool out of himself, entertaining the class as a clown, and being a total failure. And of course, not forgetting to mention his infamous catchphrase "You want to die ah?" That, my friends, is the mentality of a Physics teacher, a little over half a century in age. Imagine then how good it is to have a Physics teacher as described above. My sincere thanks goes to Mr.H.C.Lim, my tuition teacher for Physics. Without him, I would have been ensnared in the world of that lunatic. This concludes the induction of our first Hall Of Hater, Ng Yi Sung. Many cheers to him.
Next in the line would be the Modern Maths teacher, some lady named Chen. Sadly, I can't even remember her name. Oh well, who needs to anyway? I'm nobody to condemn anybody but this lady definitely looks ugly. Putting that aside, she thought all of us were a sick sad bunch of freaks. We were like thorns in her side. One of her favourite past time would be scolding the crap out of us. Words like "stupid", "useless" were often heard throughout the scolding. Even when nobody did anything wrong, the scolding would still be on. It has become a habit for her, a habit which made her a mad woman and much older. If we could overlook all that, she was quite a good teacher. Anyways, my little heart-felt thanks still goes to her. Guess we'll have to look at the little bright side of someone, eh? Second one down.
Now, in order to cut short my blabberings which some of you might not even understand, I would go to our final and also most outstanding Hall Of Hater. And the award goes to (drum roll), Deh-warnei Dust. This was the woman who made my life a living hell. This was the woman who made me hate my sciences. This was the woman who made me hate every inch of her. For some sort of reason, I've always been her bullseye. No matter what it was and no matter who was the culprit, I would always be the scapegoat. Besides getting fired when I wasn't even opening my gap, I would get into all sorts of trouble with her. It's quite difficult to put down in words what I've been through with her but I'm sure some of my classmates could attest to what I've said. The fact that I'm Dust's favourite target is as well known a fact as the sun exists. I'm not exaggerating but trust me, if those people in Hitler's concentration camp were alive today, they would be taking pity on me. I've made a vow to myself not to thank her no matter what grades I get. And indeed, this day, I am not thanking her one bit. She did not help me in anyway in Chemistry and I never needed her help. With that, I officially welcome our three new Hall Of Hater. Enjoy!
P/S : To all the victors in the battle, my salutations to you for triumphing in this big chapter of your life. To all my brothers and sisters in Christ, to God be the glory and may we never cease to praise Him all the remaining days of our lives. To those who are deeply moved with what I wrote above, if you are facing or faced such situations, remember, be patient just like I have been and you will triumph eventually. Love your enemies, for if you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. The Word of The Lord lives forever. Amen.
** Names used above have been changed to avoid controversies.
But, don't be discouraged. You are in another list. The hate-list. No doubt my words are harsh, but who would understand the misery of being targeted like targets for two whole years?? And to live the life I lived for such a period would be hell for any sane human. Well, at least something like hell. Telling me to shut up right now would be senseless in any sense.
And thus, the ceremony begins. The first person to be inducted into Clarence's Hall of Hate would be the infamous pants-pulling, jokes-cracking, table-thumping and words-slurring son of a gun - Ng Yi Sung. Apart from looking sleepy all the time, this guy's a GREAT Physics teacher. Oh, yea! Believe that! His well-known feats includes making a fool out of himself, entertaining the class as a clown, and being a total failure. And of course, not forgetting to mention his infamous catchphrase "You want to die ah?" That, my friends, is the mentality of a Physics teacher, a little over half a century in age. Imagine then how good it is to have a Physics teacher as described above. My sincere thanks goes to Mr.H.C.Lim, my tuition teacher for Physics. Without him, I would have been ensnared in the world of that lunatic. This concludes the induction of our first Hall Of Hater, Ng Yi Sung. Many cheers to him.
Next in the line would be the Modern Maths teacher, some lady named Chen. Sadly, I can't even remember her name. Oh well, who needs to anyway? I'm nobody to condemn anybody but this lady definitely looks ugly. Putting that aside, she thought all of us were a sick sad bunch of freaks. We were like thorns in her side. One of her favourite past time would be scolding the crap out of us. Words like "stupid", "useless" were often heard throughout the scolding. Even when nobody did anything wrong, the scolding would still be on. It has become a habit for her, a habit which made her a mad woman and much older. If we could overlook all that, she was quite a good teacher. Anyways, my little heart-felt thanks still goes to her. Guess we'll have to look at the little bright side of someone, eh? Second one down.
Now, in order to cut short my blabberings which some of you might not even understand, I would go to our final and also most outstanding Hall Of Hater. And the award goes to (drum roll), Deh-warnei Dust. This was the woman who made my life a living hell. This was the woman who made me hate my sciences. This was the woman who made me hate every inch of her. For some sort of reason, I've always been her bullseye. No matter what it was and no matter who was the culprit, I would always be the scapegoat. Besides getting fired when I wasn't even opening my gap, I would get into all sorts of trouble with her. It's quite difficult to put down in words what I've been through with her but I'm sure some of my classmates could attest to what I've said. The fact that I'm Dust's favourite target is as well known a fact as the sun exists. I'm not exaggerating but trust me, if those people in Hitler's concentration camp were alive today, they would be taking pity on me. I've made a vow to myself not to thank her no matter what grades I get. And indeed, this day, I am not thanking her one bit. She did not help me in anyway in Chemistry and I never needed her help. With that, I officially welcome our three new Hall Of Hater. Enjoy!
P/S : To all the victors in the battle, my salutations to you for triumphing in this big chapter of your life. To all my brothers and sisters in Christ, to God be the glory and may we never cease to praise Him all the remaining days of our lives. To those who are deeply moved with what I wrote above, if you are facing or faced such situations, remember, be patient just like I have been and you will triumph eventually. Love your enemies, for if you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. The Word of The Lord lives forever. Amen.
** Names used above have been changed to avoid controversies.
Tuesday, February 28, 2006
This World, So Unfair...Or Is It Just My Country?
Warning. The following story which I'm about to narrate will definitely boil your blood and burst your veins. Nah, just some hyperboule for introduction but then again, not just plain hyperboule. It contains a splinter of truth and the truth is, that was just what nearly happened to me on one Tuesday afternoon, dated 28th of February 2006.
It would be a beautiful and flawless day if it were not for the damn hocus pocus I had to go through in order to get my MyKad. You see, me and my mom had to travel miles, all the way to some cursed, isolated place in the middle of nowhere, just to get a piece of card when things could be a million times simpler if people were to just use what they have - brains. And that's just the beginning of a very bad dream which cannot even qualify as a nightmare.
Sometimes, I just could not understand where is the little intelligence in some people. I don't know where do they put their brains or when do they use them. I mean look, we have a nice building, completely or almost new, in the most strategic place one can ever imagine (Greentown Ipoh) and yet our Jabatan Pendaftaran Negara was purposely moved to some isolated place even further out than Silibin. And just today, the price of petrol has gone way up by 30 cents a litre. Man, I'm living in Pasir Putih! Can you fathom the distance I have to travel? And can you calculate the loss in that? Now, that's what we call mere wastage. Both of time and money. Talk about being thrifty. This is the first issue I would like to address.
Upon reaching there, I thought, "Alright. This will be worth it since I'm getting my MyKad." Hell no. I was completely wrong. It didn't really take me a long time to get my MyKad in there. But the way the staff were doing their job made me sick. Some of them were just walking around like they were doing window-shopping in a huge mall. They have few counters and yet only one or two were operating. The way they were doing their job makes one wonder if there's nobody waiting for anything in there at all. This is the second issue I would like to address.
While queueing up for my number, a woman came and stood next to me. I thought, "Well, maybe she'd move behind me when the queue moves." And this was the day when all my thoughts were wrong. She kept moving up alongside me. I was getting angrier by the minute when suddenly, she left the queue. I thought, "Aha. Now she knows who's the boss." But as I said earlier, this was the day when all my thoughts were wrong. This was my Friday the 13th. I turned around and saw her calling her husband and these were her words which fueled my wrath. She spoke in Cantonese to her husband, "Line up here. You're behind the guy with red shirt." She was completely ignoring my presence, like I was invisible. The guy with red shirt was right in front of me and here she's telling her husband that her place was just behind that guy, dethroning me from the place I deserved. And so, her husband took her place alongside me and continued what was started by her. While almost my turn, the staff at the counter made a remark to the husband of that unreasonable woman saying, "Encik, tolong berbaris." I thought, "Aha. Justice is served this time." But he got off by just mumbling, "Bini saya suruh saya baris sini." which I'm quite sure the staff didn't hear a word. And so, I lost out to the infamous queue-cutting couple.
The number rang and it was my turn to collect my MyKad at the counter. I went with an overflowing hope that I'll get a nice and beautiful MyKad. The first impression I got when I look at myself in the MyKad was that I was a drug-addict who simply can't get enough of drugs. Putting the photo aside, everything was well apparently. I went on to check my details and fine enough, something was good this time, or so I thought (Now take note of the word "I thought" here). Then I went to another counter to check for further details, which was my religion and to my dismay, I was entered as a Buddhist. The guy at the counter asked me, "Do you want to change your religion in the system or in the chip or both?" I replied, "Both." and he gave me some forms which were exactly what I filled up when I applied for the MyKad the first time. Then, I was given a number and I had to wait again. The apparent consolation I thought I was getting was this : I'd get a new MyKad with a better photo. =P
I went when they called my number and sure enough, I took a photo and was asked to wait till they call my number again. And so, the waiting continued for awhile before it was finally my turn. Now, this is the final blow which dashed all my hopes to the ground. I was asked by the woman staff, "Do you want to change your religion in the system or in the chip?" I told her I want both. And her answer was one you thought you heard wrongly or you had trouble with your hearing. She told me that to change the religion in the system would be free but to change the religion in the chip will cause me RM10. Come on! Where is the justice in that? I wasn't even at fault here and now you're asking me to pay for your fault? Finally, she told me that I had to change my MyKad again when I'm 18, which I will be in November 2006. She then told me to wait till then and not waste 10 bucks for nothing now. That's reasonable. NOT! I was forced to change my IC to MyKad because the government said they will fine those who don't in December 2005. And here, I was told I need to change it once more when I'm 18. So the question is, why didn't they just let me wait till I'm 18 and change my MyKad once and for all, thus avoiding all these nonsense??
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the brains of some folks.
It would be a beautiful and flawless day if it were not for the damn hocus pocus I had to go through in order to get my MyKad. You see, me and my mom had to travel miles, all the way to some cursed, isolated place in the middle of nowhere, just to get a piece of card when things could be a million times simpler if people were to just use what they have - brains. And that's just the beginning of a very bad dream which cannot even qualify as a nightmare.
Sometimes, I just could not understand where is the little intelligence in some people. I don't know where do they put their brains or when do they use them. I mean look, we have a nice building, completely or almost new, in the most strategic place one can ever imagine (Greentown Ipoh) and yet our Jabatan Pendaftaran Negara was purposely moved to some isolated place even further out than Silibin. And just today, the price of petrol has gone way up by 30 cents a litre. Man, I'm living in Pasir Putih! Can you fathom the distance I have to travel? And can you calculate the loss in that? Now, that's what we call mere wastage. Both of time and money. Talk about being thrifty. This is the first issue I would like to address.
Upon reaching there, I thought, "Alright. This will be worth it since I'm getting my MyKad." Hell no. I was completely wrong. It didn't really take me a long time to get my MyKad in there. But the way the staff were doing their job made me sick. Some of them were just walking around like they were doing window-shopping in a huge mall. They have few counters and yet only one or two were operating. The way they were doing their job makes one wonder if there's nobody waiting for anything in there at all. This is the second issue I would like to address.
While queueing up for my number, a woman came and stood next to me. I thought, "Well, maybe she'd move behind me when the queue moves." And this was the day when all my thoughts were wrong. She kept moving up alongside me. I was getting angrier by the minute when suddenly, she left the queue. I thought, "Aha. Now she knows who's the boss." But as I said earlier, this was the day when all my thoughts were wrong. This was my Friday the 13th. I turned around and saw her calling her husband and these were her words which fueled my wrath. She spoke in Cantonese to her husband, "Line up here. You're behind the guy with red shirt." She was completely ignoring my presence, like I was invisible. The guy with red shirt was right in front of me and here she's telling her husband that her place was just behind that guy, dethroning me from the place I deserved. And so, her husband took her place alongside me and continued what was started by her. While almost my turn, the staff at the counter made a remark to the husband of that unreasonable woman saying, "Encik, tolong berbaris." I thought, "Aha. Justice is served this time." But he got off by just mumbling, "Bini saya suruh saya baris sini." which I'm quite sure the staff didn't hear a word. And so, I lost out to the infamous queue-cutting couple.
The number rang and it was my turn to collect my MyKad at the counter. I went with an overflowing hope that I'll get a nice and beautiful MyKad. The first impression I got when I look at myself in the MyKad was that I was a drug-addict who simply can't get enough of drugs. Putting the photo aside, everything was well apparently. I went on to check my details and fine enough, something was good this time, or so I thought (Now take note of the word "I thought" here). Then I went to another counter to check for further details, which was my religion and to my dismay, I was entered as a Buddhist. The guy at the counter asked me, "Do you want to change your religion in the system or in the chip or both?" I replied, "Both." and he gave me some forms which were exactly what I filled up when I applied for the MyKad the first time. Then, I was given a number and I had to wait again. The apparent consolation I thought I was getting was this : I'd get a new MyKad with a better photo. =P
I went when they called my number and sure enough, I took a photo and was asked to wait till they call my number again. And so, the waiting continued for awhile before it was finally my turn. Now, this is the final blow which dashed all my hopes to the ground. I was asked by the woman staff, "Do you want to change your religion in the system or in the chip?" I told her I want both. And her answer was one you thought you heard wrongly or you had trouble with your hearing. She told me that to change the religion in the system would be free but to change the religion in the chip will cause me RM10. Come on! Where is the justice in that? I wasn't even at fault here and now you're asking me to pay for your fault? Finally, she told me that I had to change my MyKad again when I'm 18, which I will be in November 2006. She then told me to wait till then and not waste 10 bucks for nothing now. That's reasonable. NOT! I was forced to change my IC to MyKad because the government said they will fine those who don't in December 2005. And here, I was told I need to change it once more when I'm 18. So the question is, why didn't they just let me wait till I'm 18 and change my MyKad once and for all, thus avoiding all these nonsense??
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the brains of some folks.
Sunday, February 05, 2006
Unshave Me Bald?
Lost hair in a bet
There is nothing like instances to grow hair on a bald-head argument. The words of Mark Twain echoes through my mind. The latest episode of the Police-Citizen epic was this. 1 man with a coffee shop, 10 men with mahjong : 11 men shaved bald. The whole story was as simple as this. It wasn't even one month away after the nude-squat issue was barely settled and here comes another drama. My mind is overflowing with words to describe the police force but "out of control", I would say, are the best.
Where is freedom? Where is democracy? What crime did they commit, these 11 men? What crime did they commit, deserving such humiliation? A simple game of mahjong? Alleged gambling? Ridiculous. Absurd. One could never fully fathom the mind of the police force. But yet, as the Bible says, quoting from Luke 7:35, "But wisdom is justified of all her children." True wisdom shows itself by its works; folly is never found in the wise man’s way, any more than wisdom is in the path of a fool.
These 11 men were not completely innocent. But neither were they guilty in such a way as to deserve such treatment. Why did criminals, who committed even more serious offences, not receive a hair cut, what more to say, shaved bald? Let's say that these 11 men were indeed gambling. Then, and only then that they are guilty of a crime. But what if they were not even gambling? What if they were just having a mere game of mahjong to blend into the Chinese New Year mood? Both options leave no room for the police to justify their actions. Guilty or not, they never deserved such treatment. They were no murderers. They were no rapists. They were no dogs to begin with.
One of the most outrageous thing that I found was this. The police were unrepentant. They were not even sorry for their actions. They claimed that shaving heads was a law and was necessary. This is no different than a murderer who killed someone and then claimed that he has to do it as it was necessary. A game of mahjong is simply a tradition. It's simply a game, to meet up with friends during the Chinese New Year festive season, and to sum it up, it's simply for fellowship. Now, everyone would be afraid to touch mahjong every Chinese New Year. Everyone would be afraid to use chips to play mahjong. Everyone would be afraid to play mahjong even without chips. Think of the possible consequences of this incident. Think of the worst case scenario. This could cause a tension between races. Just one foolish act by the police and the many years of building and bonding of relationship between races could be destroyed. The Chinese would accuse the government of being unfair and unjust. They would think, why were the Malays not caught for playing with fire-crackers during Hari Raya? Why were the Indians not fined for dirtying the streets during Thaipussam? As simple an incident as this may result in a tragedy similar to the one in 13 May 1969. Maybe worse.
We know that the government has been fair all the while. Still, this incident definitely brought a certain impact upon everyone (but of course not as serious as what I said). Citizens would have a different view about the police force now (it's not like we do not have one before). A view, maybe, of how abusive is the police force. The only thing we as citizens can do is to forgive. Christian or not, forgiving is no harm to anybody. The police should be granted another chance. We should not put the final nail in the coffin just yet. Let us wait for the change, the improvement that we hope to see. Let us pray that the nail would never need to be hammered in, or heads need to be shaved again.
Thursday, January 12, 2006
The Battle
The struggle got heavier. Each second seemed like forever. He wouldn't give up. Neither would I. Both of us fought intensely. I stood my ground, he stood his. After a long period of win-win situation, I mustled up all the energy I could find. I gave it all I could and I pushed. It's not working. I pushed again. Harder this time. But to my dismay, he was as solid as a rock, not even budging. It has been an hour but still everything remained as it was. He was once the source of my energy but now he was the source of my pain. I stopped for a moment, trying to catch my breath. Sweat was all over me. The air inside the room was intoxicated with a foul smell. Probably due to the emission of a certain gas from his body. I couldn't stand it anymore. I told myself that I have to get out of here. Though my body was weak and exhausted, without a single ounce of energy, I pulled myself up. I felt an excruciating pain from the inside. It was as though I could hear him laughing at me. I surrendered to the pain and stopped for a moment or two. I began to look around for something solid which I can push against. The walls beside me looked most inviting. I pushed against them with my bare hands. I was almost standing. This time, a sudden surge of energy occured in me and I victoriously pushed him out. He fell down into the water and there he laid, still and motionless. I heaved a great sigh of relieve. I turned around and looked down at him. He was still in one piece. The water cushioned the fall. A soft wind blew, and I could almost hear a faint voice cursing me. There was only was last thing to do and that was to finish him off. I pulled the handle down. A rumbling sound was heard and water flowed out vigorously with great speed. The water came down on him, crushing him and he went whirling down the hole, lost forever in the seas of waste matter. I stood for awhile, reminiscing the fight that I fought. A soft wind blew past me. I won the battle. The battle of constipation.
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