Presenting... Chicken Meat.Chicken Meat Five

Undergraduates from the Faculty of Economics & Administration, University of Malaya, present Statistics II.

Good English:

"By using the Z-test, we can conclude that at a 0.05 level of significance, there is sufficient evidence of a difference in mean for the variables selected."

New English:

"By using the jackass, we can conclude that at a jirou point jirou fi level of significant, there is sufficient evident of a different in mean for the variable selected."

Points To Ponder:

1) Presentations ≠ Assignments. They are supposed to be precise and concise. The lecturer doesn't need another copy of your assignment in powerpoint format.

2) Presenting ≠ Reading. The lecturer and your friends (not all though) are intelligent people. They can read.

3) English ≠ Mandarin. Do not speak loudly and fluently in Mandarin before the presentation. You will mess your languages up.

4) Quantity ≠ Quality. Do not put slides filled to the brim with words and numbers in your presentation. Not all your fellow undergraduates are easily fooled.

5) Speed ≠ Fluency. Reading hastily (or scrolling through slides) without any pauses doesn't show that you're fluent in English. Nor does it show your knowledge. Superman would not have caught a word.

Just some food for thought.

P/S: If you don't know by now, jirou = chicken meat in Mandarin.

A day in the life of a lecturer.

Yes, sir! I'm sure there aren't any easier or simpler words such as TOLERATION!

Yes, sir! We know you're VERY SICK that's why you FORGOT to prepare for class!

Yes, sir! We believe you're not LAZY but you just don't feel very well every week!

Yes, sir! Have a GOOD SLEEP while we stay guard for you! We'll throw UM car stickers if we see Ghauth Jasmon coming in!

Fin.

I am from the infamous UNIVERSITI MALAYA!

Great administration, great services, great facilities, GREAT VC!

All hail GHAUTH JASMON!

All hail his student's-welfare-first policies!

It's raining car stickers in UM!

Grab one with your buttcrack now while stocks last!

A Great Flaw

This is the original article (with the title) I wrote and sent to Malaysiakini.

You can read the published one here.

I am a second year student in UM. I am writing this to express my discontent over a prevailing issue in Universiti Malaya. I would narrate a recent experience to emphasise my point. Just yesterday, on a Sunday evening, I was pulled over by the security guard at the KL gate. I was told by the guard rudely that if I wanted to go to PJ, I’d have to take a big round instead of passing through UM; even if I’m a student of Universiti Malaya. Right up to here, everything seems fine and the guard seems perfectly justified. But what I’m puzzled over is how random and inconsistent these security checks are; laced with heavy double standards. I understand perfectly that 1^st and 2^nd year students are not allowed to bring their vehicles into campus in order to reduce the traffic. However, this was never implemented with consistency and most of the time, everyone is allowed to pass through UM without as much as a question. The enactment of this policy was a wrong move to begin with; what more the failed implementation. Administration in UM should understand that they do not have enough places in their residential colleges for everyone to stay in campus. That is why three quarter of 2^nd and 3^rd year students have to live outside. And not all students staying outside of campus have direct access to public transport to get to class. And so, some of these students enjoy the privilege of having their own cars as a mean of transport. However, now we face another problem. If we’re not allowed to bring our cars into the campus, how are we supposed to get to class? What with the high food and lodging costs of staying outside, now we have to take a taxi to the nearest bus or LRT station every single day to get to UM just because we’re not allowed to bring our cars into campus even though we have one?

I strongly believe that the administration should have thought of this before enacting and implementing ineffective and half the time, inactive policies as such. And because of the inconsistency of the policy’s implementation, students are often confused about the legitimacy of bringing their vehicles into campus. But we still do it anyway out of desperation, and most of the time, we do get away with it. What I suggest here is the eradication of this policy so that students are no longer stopped randomly just because the security guard at the gate feels like it on that particular day or the security guard on shift is a hardworking one who doesn’t slack in upholding the institution’s policies. I believe that UM students, most of the time with the only intent of attending lectures (even for the purpose of bypassing traffic), should be allowed to bring their vehicles into campus and utilise its roads.

With that in light, I also question UM’s policy concerning the public’s use of its gates. Is the public allowed to use the roads in UM or only people who have serious business in UM? I think everyone can agree that every day, a great number of road users utilise the compounds of UM to pass from PJ to KL or vice versa in order to avoid the traffic in Federal Highway. But these people were never stopped; almost all time. Why weren’t these people stopped by the security guard at the gate? Why wasn’t the man driving a Mercedes Benz stopped while I, a student of Universiti Malaya, was stopped and questioned rudely like a criminal? People with nice, collared shirt driving big, expensive cars are allowed to pass from KL to PJ through UM grounds while trendy looking youths driving economical Peroduas have to be questioned and let through with a warning never to use the road again. Isn’t this a display of double standards at its highest?

Therefore, I hope that the administration come up with a clear policy with effective implementation on these two issues: UM students bringing their vehicles into the campus and utilising its roads, and the public use of UM’s roads. ONE, either you stop and question every single person entering UM, allowing students or those with business in UM to pass through, or TWO, you open the roads for public use. I believe the former would be a crazy idea to even be considered as we already have a major traffic jam at both the KL and PJ gates during peak hours in the evening. I hope that this seemingly little but important issue is brought to the attention of people who have the power to do something about it and resolved as soon as possible.

Clarence Choong
2^nd year student of UM

How I Discovered I Was A Mutant

14th June 2009

It all started on a calm Sunday morning. I woke up at about 0715 to prepare for morning worship in church. As usual, I took my bath. Before we continue on, let me briefly explain certain necessary facts. The water piping system in every house differs. For mine, the shower and the tap share a common pipeline. This means that the usage of one affects the other. For example, if I'm using the shower and at the same time, I turn on the basin tap, the volume of water that flows out from the shower head will be disrupted and reduced. It's a very basic and common theory; thus, never really caught my attention before this. However, a strange occurence this morning compelled me to record this down; in the event anything untoward happens to me.

Let's pick up from where we stopped. As I was bathing, I turned on the tap to rinse my mouth. As expected (inferred from the theory above), less water flowed out from the shower head I was holding. I carried on bathing without much notice until I decided to take a leak. I was holding the shower head while urinating when I realised the flow of water was still disrupted. I turned my head around to check if I left the tap running; strange enough, I didn't. And so, mildly surprised, I decided to put the shower head back in place. When I did that, things returned to normal. Dismissing some ridiculous ideas in my head, I concluded that the piping system was probably messed up.

The water was a little too cold in the morning. I turned the water heater on and resumed bathing. After awhile, a warm feeling enveloped my body. The joy of heater, I thought. It felt good at first but when it gradually grew warmer, I began to feel uncomfortable. Thinking it was the water, I tried adjusting the heat level - to no avail. Soon, the warmth turned into a burning sensation and I turned the shower off altogether. I began to freak out when the heat did not subside. In a moment of panic, I rushed out of the shower and managed to turn the heater off before I was barbecued alive.

I told my mom I wasn't feeling too well for church that day and locked myself in the room. In my towel, I sat and thought to myself. After one too many ideas flooded my mind, I could no longer sit and think. I plucked my courage and went into the bathroom. With one hand, I held the shower head. I turned the water on and the flow was normal. Then, I took a deep breath and started to urinate. To my horror, the flow of water was disrupted and significantly reduced. I was functioning like the basin tap! I did another experiment with the heater and achieved the expected results. I soon realised that my body hacked into every system I was in contact with and fused with it. Stunned and speechless, I walked out of the bathroom a naked man.

I do not yet know the extent of my powers in detail but what I do know is that I could no longer live in the same community anymore. I had to leave. I put some clothes on, packed my stuff, wrote a note, and left the house before my mom came home. In that note, it says:

Dear Mom,

I'm sorry to leave on such a short notice but it's a decision I have to make with a heavy heart. I'm not sure if you were aware of this or you were hiding my true origins from me all along. I found out today that I'm different from all of you and I could no longer live in a community of normal beings. If I stay, my true nature would soon be exposed and chaos would follow. I do not want to put the family at risk; most importantly, put you at risk with the authorities and the inconsiderate majority living in fear of my kind. I do not want to endanger you, mom. Time is running out. Live well.

With love,

Clarence.

And so, I walk a lonely road in search of answers, my brethren, and acceptance.

The road of a mutant.

The Times, They Are a-Changing

Movie Carnival 2009 was a great experience. With a group of friends, I signed up for this 10-days-job. Tiring but nonetheless, every moment was worth it. Throughout these 10 days, I learnt many valuable lessons. Lessons on life which I thought I already knew.

If you've seen some of the photos I uploaded in Facebook, you might be wondering what my job actually was. Well, my job scope actually covers the movie patrol; none of that which you saw in those photos. Basically, I go around with 2 other colleagues, playing games, asking movie trivias, and giving out freebies; including free movie tickets! But hey, it wasn't an easy job. In fact, it was tough and embarassing. Especially when there were no people around and you have to talk to the air yelling "Free stuff!" It also pissed me off when people treated us with the disgust they usually lash on a salesperson. Some even walk away without looking at us, as if we were invisible. But I have the last laugh. You stupid people missed out on all the freebies. You people will never enjoy any good and free stuff in life. You will always live with a protective shell around you. Uneducated kiasu cynics. Go live in Singapore.

And throughout this period, I got to know many people. Call me a "katak di bawah tempurung" but I never realised the culture now is so different. Quoting Bob Dylan, the times, they really are a-changing. Smoking is no longer a taboo (even for girls) and tattoos are as common as piercings. I'm not stereotyping, I'm not discriminating, but I'm living on principles. I don't consider smoking morally wrong; there's not even any direct verses in the Bible which forbid smoking. But being a Christian, I do not want to be a stumbling block to people around me. Plus, smoking kills. Yes, I'm a Christian and I'm not ashamed to be one. So, when I found out that both my colleagues smoke, I had to detach myself from the group; often joining my friends in the Superhero Factory whenever there's free time.

Now, don't get me wrong. They were nice and fun people and it was great knowing them. However, through the course of our interaction, I came to a conclusion we were people from different worlds. And so, with a barrier in between, the friendship could never go any deeper than a superficial one. Nevertheless, I would always consider the paths worth crossing.

Throughout this period, I also realised that only by living together will you discover how one differs from the other. 5 of us, we were living under the same roof; 5 with very different characters and believe me, there were unhappiness even for the short time. However, I learnt to give and take. Though I may not say it quite as much, I always knew who my true friends were. Here, I want to especially thank Kin Wai. In the way you treated me and Wee Keng, I can't help but be moved by your sincerity. I never knew you quite so well before this but I think I do now; a little more at least. You are a true friend. You have a character that I salute.  

Many years have passed, many people have changed. And I've seen many principles compromised and slain by the unrelenting peer pressure. But the core of the problem never was the people. The problem lies with the individual. Nothing is beyond control. It's a choice. I do not want to be conformed to this world. I want be transformed by the renewing spirit of the mind. But how can I be transformed when I'm a weak and struggling Christian? And hence, I fear for myself; how long can I live on my principles? Will I too change one day? Will I see myself walking down the road of conformity in years to come? Uncertainty is the heart of fear. And fear is the heart of every man.

I want the power to change; for better, not for worse. The power to change not only me but the people around me. I want to conform without compromising my principles and values. I want to be a Jew to the Jews, a Gentile to the Gentiles. I want to conform in the way that I may have the power to transform.

I want the city on the hill to be seen.

I Wish I Knew How It Would Feel To Be Free

27th April 2009

It was the day of my freedom; I was released from the clutches that held me for 4 gruelling months. Overwhelmed by feelings of joy, we decided to hold a celebration to commemorate our release. Not forever but a temporal release from studying. It was decided that we all need to let out the grudges we bore within us against the system we live in. And so, karaoke was the solution.

How interesting was it? I would say it was 60-40. Let me justify myself with an elaborate explanation. It was 40% good because I felt so relieved after one week of suffering and toiling. It's this feeling you get, where you have no more worries in the world and you can just sit there, waste time and not feel guilty about it. No offence to my friends who were with me, 60% of the day was bad for me.

Three reasons. Firstly, I spent the night before singing and composing songs with my friends that I lost 70% of my voice the following day. Now, of course, who would enjoy a karaoke session without his full voice to abuse? Secondly, there were too many Mandarin songs sung. I don't understand and I can't read Mandarin. And there's this thing with Mandarin songs; almost 90% of the time, they have this similar rhythm, tune, and flow. Heck, even the MVs were the same! Almost every MV you have this guy and girl kissing or rolling on the bed. I guess to the Chinese, songs are all about love and relationships. Yes, karaoke's not the place for me to appreciate true music but nevertheless, I always have this tendency in me to evaluate a song's musical value.

I was being a couch potato and staring blankly at the screen when I asked myself, "What's the date today?" I realised it was 27th April 2009. I stopped; my heart sank. It was Dad's birthday the previous day. Somehow, I didn't remember. The person who has done so much for me and loved me like no one ever has is now but a memory.

I sat there, feeling disappointed. I didn't want to forget, yet I did. My feelings changed. Apart from being tired, sorrow consumed me. Memories flooded my mind. Birthdays were special to Dad. He had his own trademarked ways of celebrating birthdays in the family. Go away; don't bother me. What good are memories when the person is not around anymore? It just kills me a little more inside everytime this happens.

27th April 2009. Yes, I finally got my freedom. But I never had freedom from my memories.

It hurts. It still hurts.

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Luther Vandross - Dance With My Father Again

Back when I was a child 
Before life removed all the innocence 
My father would lift me high 
And dance with my mother and me and then

Spin me around till I fell asleep 
Then up the stairs he would carry me 
And I knew for sure 
I was loved

If I could get another chance 
Another walk, another dance with him 
I'd play a song that would never, ever end 
How I'd love, love, love to dance with my father again

When I and my mother would disagree 
To get my way I would run from her to him 
He'd make me laugh just to comfort me, yeah, yeah 
Then finally make me do just what my mama said

Later that night when I was asleep 
He left a dollar under my sheet 
Never dreamed that he 
Would be gone from me

If I could steal one final glance 
One final step, one final dance with him 
I'd play a song that would never, ever end 
Cause I'd love, love, love to dance with my father again

Sometimes I'd listen outside her door 
And I'd hear her, mama cryin' for him 
I pray for her even more than me 
I pray for her even more than me

I know I'm prayin' for much too much 
But could You send back the only man she loved 
I know You don't do it usually 
But Lord, she's dyin' to dance with my father again 
Every night I fall asleep 
And this is all I ever dream

Passive Manipulation

 My last paper for this semester is in 2 hours. Don't be misunderstood; I did not wake up early just to do some last minute revision. In fact, I did not sleep. Lately, I have been having some conversations concerning the Christian life with one of my friends. As the 3 of us sat at Sahur yesterday, again, we were at topics which revolved around this.

To be honest, I'm no saint. To be honest, I'm a sinner. And maybe one worse than most of you out there. During my early secondary years, I mixed with a group of "heavy" Cantonese speaking friends. It was those years that I was a foul-mouthed little brat with a very enhanced and comprehensive vocabulary of vulgar words. As I grew up, my conscience prompted me to stop. I did in a way. I no longer use explicit foul words but retained milder forms of them such as "bitch", "asshole", and those within the same category. For me, it was, "Hey, as long as I don't use Cantonese bad words or the F-word, I'm justified." And so, developed a self-righteous theory which I lived with for years.

We all want to be Christians the easy way. We all want to be good Christians but retain some sins in certain respects of our lives. I give in a little, I compromise Christianity a little, and we have what I term a comfortable contract of living. Until now, I never realised I was setting double standards in my Christian life. Consider sin. What categories exist? Is murder any heavier a sin than theft? Is adultery much greater a sin than pornography? The truth is, categories don't exist. You don't measure sin. You don't compare one sin's sinfulness with another. Even we, sinners, are equal in the eyes of God. So, what makes one sin different from another? Going back to the issue, what makes one bad word less explicit than the other? What makes "bitch" a less vulgar word than "fuck"? At this point, I'm disheartened because I'm self-righteous. I'm an unworthy sinner. I'm a hypocrite.

It's this. Something happened of late. I witnessed how blasphemous and vulgar a Christian can get. In my somewhat mixed feelings of humour and disapproval at what I saw, I became disgusted with myself. Even though I was a witness, I couldn't bring myself to correct my fellow brethren. How can I remove the speck which is in my brother's eyes when I fail to see the log in my own? God reminded and I made a decision. I will to break down the distinction I set between vulgar words of seemingly varying "degrees". I will to remove self-justifying double standards in my life. I will to be a lesser hypocrite than I already am.

This tends to be a trivial issue to many. In fact, some couldn't care less. My friend argued and told me it doesn't matter because it's just a form of expressing himself when he's agitated or frustrated. He told me it doesn't matter because he didn't mean those things he utters. It was nothing but mere statements of exclamation. But out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. How can we with the same mouth bless our God and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the similitude of God? Does a spring send forth fresh water and bitter from the same opening? Can a fig tree bear olive, or a grapevine bear figs?

Yes, many may further argue that vulgar words are defined by culture. No matter how you look at it, certain words will always be vulgar words, regardless of the etymology of the word or its exact purpose, meaning, or intent. So why should I bother? In essence, it's not that wrong after all. "Fuck" is just another word for having sex. It's culture that defines it as uncouth, as vulgar. I couldn't care less about what people think as long as I know I'm right. But my brethren, we are called to be imitators of Christ. We are His walking and living testimonies. It shouldn't be so but people judge Christianity by Christians, not by the faith itself. As ugly as it may sound, we Christians are living under scrutiny. We cannot do what the society deems as morally wrong, unacceptable, or in a more generic term, sin; even if it means sacrificing some of our pleasures and earthly contentment. And only he who is stronger can give in to the weaker. May we be less, and let Christ be more, that people will see and believe. 

My Sister, Cheryl

Folks, click on the image to view the conversation in enlarged mode.

As promised, sis. =)

P/S: Oh, just in case some of you don't get it, Damansara Perdana's where my sister stays in KL and of course, Pasir Puteh's our hometown in Ipoh. She's the first person I know who doesn't know dp stands for display picture. LOL.

A Walk To Remember

Class of 5sc1

Let me slip against the current.

This was bugging me so I thought I'd just blog it to get it off my mind. This will be a long one.

I lay on my bed and memories flooded my mind. I started recalling all the close friends I made along the walk of life. Friends whom I've lost along the way, and friends I'm still in touch with. I began to see the pattern which friendships take on. Different phases in our lives demand different people. As we move on with life, friendships move on too.

I took an elaborate step by attempting to recall all the close friends I have, starting from primary school. To my surprise, it wasn't difficult to identify them. Back in Standard 3, my close friends were Wong King Mun and Suen Whei Yeap. I still remember our obsession with comic books and drawing our own comics. I also recall the times we went to each other's house to watch Dragonball. Things changed when Whei Yeap achieved excellent results in PTS and went one year ahead of us. The bond was broken in the end. I'm no longer in contact with both of them.

Standard 4 was one of the best times in my life. This was the phase I discovered one of my closest friend, whom I'm still in constant contact with. I still remember Kumara and me being enemies at first because back then, I didn't like Indians for some unknown reason. But somehow, the teacher made us sit together in Standard 4 and so, a beautiful friendship was fostered. I still remember we had a comfortable place at the back of the class, where we plastered notes like "Clarence & Kumara's Territory" to privatize the zone. Happy times.

We move on to Standard 5. If my memories didn't get the time zones wrong, it was William in this phase. I couldn't really remember when this friendship occured but the fact that it has impacted me to a certain extent proves how important it was to me. William frequented my house, where we played computer games and football together. We also had a common interest in tortoises. In fact, he was the one who introduced raring tortoises to me. The interest has certainly lost most of its spark with time, but nevertheless, a dim glow of it appears now and then. After Form 6, we are not in contact anymore.

Then came Standard 6. I had a fairly mixed number of close friends in this phase. What I still vividly remember is the small group I had which comprised of me, Shafiq, Eddie Raj, and Stephen. This was multi-ethnic integration at its highest level. We did most of the stupid things together, like running around the old pondok, galah panjang, jengket, football with plastic bottles and collecting biji sagu. It was also a phase where bottlecaps were a trend, with batu seremban and sorts. There are so much I remember that I couldn't write it all. Totally lost touch with Shafiq after he transferred to Teknik school (or something like that). Same goes for Eddie after we moved into different classes in secondary school.

Well, I was also close to Khael and Andrew Wong. Andrew wasn't someone easy to get along with but somehow, there was a little chemistry between us. This friendship carried on right up to Form 3, as we were in the same class. Kumara was also in that class too. I still remember us going out together and sharing games like Pizza and Heroes of Might and Magic. We were also into guitars in that phase. Timothy also appeared along this phase. And together as junior prefects, we started to build a close bond together.

Timothy was in the same class in Form 4 with me. It was at this phase that I rebuilt the friendship I used to have with Stephen as well. Here, I made close friends such as Yohanand, Kok Chen, Seng Hoe, and Bernard. The crazy times in class were beyond anything that I have and will ever experience. Shit we did in Chemistry and Bio classes, during Moral lessons, plus football during PJ were priceless. I'd never trade those moments and memories for anything in the world. Recently, I've caught up with Stephen and Bernard. In touch with Timothy, Kok Chen, and Seng Hoe once in awhile. Gavin also appeared at this point. Every morning, he would walk to my house and I'd give him a ride on my bike to school. Because of that, we gradually became close and shared common interests in GTA3, The Rasmus, and the like. We also went to the same Add Maths and Physics tuition together. Again, I've yet to catch up with this friend.

Let's do some retro. Michael appeared in Standard 6. We went through ups and downs in our friendship. We went out together and also shared interest in comics and "hamsup" things. However, we fought over issues I could not positively affirm now and didn't speak for few years in secondary school. In the end, I swallowed my pride and approached him at the bus stop one day after school. We talked once more and rebuilt the shattered ruins of our friendship. It wasn't difficult; we succeeded without much effort. In contact with him, now and then.

Form 6 was great too. I was afraid I'd be lonely at first, as most of my friends were going overseas. Thank God, Yohanand, Bernard, and Kumara were all here. It was at this phase that our friendships were further strengthened. It was great to have Yohanand around, what more in prefects this time. The LTC song we wrote, jamming sessions, Sixth Form Night, ping-pong matches, CF; they were all good. Bernard was also my company when I was in LSS5 initially before I changed to art stream. Not forgetting Boon Ann, whom I met in LSS5 and gradually developed a good friendship. I will never forget watching Euro 2008 with him and eating "tong sui kai" food about 3am in the morning. Again, Kumara was around in Form 6, and we had alot of good times. He also tried to get me more into scouting but failed miserably. I just hope I do not lose these friends in years to come.

Adrian also appeared in Form 6. Surprisingly, he was one of the earliest friends I have since Standard 1. Although we were not close, I've always bullied him back then. And even now. Haha. In Form 6, the friendship was built when I changed to Arts stream. With the foundations laid long ago, and being the only few pure Michaelians in the class, it wasn't much of a problem to bond. Class hours, DotA times, songs we shared, chicks we watched, moments in tuition, and chuch activities will always be a part of me I will not erase.

Of course, not forgetting to mention, there's always the church bunch I hanged out with. The childhood friends of mine. Andrew Chun and Vincent were the closest friends I had back then. Almost all the weekends we spent together in church activities and the like; youth meetings, Sunday services, church slumbers, outreaches, our very own sleepovers and various activities. We worked together so often that there was mutual understanding between us. We knew each other's characters inside out. Andrew's in UK now, not hearing from him lately. Vincent, after going off to Nilai, was no longer so close to us. But every once in awhile, when I see him during his breaks, we find that the old is not gone. And when this group of close, childhood buddies moved on, new ones also appeared. These people are the likes of Glenn, Steven, Kian Aun and the bunch I hang out with now. Though we are close in certain ways, the friendship is still very different from the ones I've built long ago. But in time to come, they will also eventually grow to become like those; but again, I have to bear in mind that just like myself, the next phase of life is awaiting some of them.

I regret, I blame myself for not maintaining the friendships I had. As much as I try, I'm a person who lacks initiative. I find it hard to keep constant contact with people, especially if they are far off. However, I'm trying now because I do not want to let my friendships fall along the walk of life again. The few close ones I still have, I'll fight for life to keep them. So, do not be afraid, or feel weird, if I pm you often in MSN or you suddenly receive my SMS one day. It's just because I want to know how you're doing. It's just because the friendship means something to me.

And after all that has been said and done, I find myself alone right now. Yes, the few close friends I have are still close to me in certain ways, especially when we meet up. But they are scattered all over Malaysia, in fact, the world, and things are different when you don't get to see each other that often. Currently, I'm going through another phase of life. But unlike the phases of life I've passed, I'm not able to build any close friendships like I did before. Maybe (hopefully) when I look back in a few years time, I can blog about the close friends I made in university life. For now, I'm just another lonesome dude living in solitude.

And solitude is good...

The Chronicles Of Wadeland: The Hedonistic Wades

It is with much sadness and grief that this epic tale is recalled. This happened before Wadeboyboy's betrayal of Wadeland, leaving for greener pastures, to another land faraway.

It was a cool night, the skies were starry with a full moon beaming overhead. 4 Wades got together for a bachelor's night out. Wadeboyboy drove his red Ferrari and picked the remaining 3 Wades up. Little did they know, it was going to be one wild night.

The following part of the tale will be recalled in dialogues.

Wadefish: Bro, where we going lah?

Wadeboyboy: I know good places around here. We can have some "fun". *evil grin*

Wadecool: What??? I'm scared lah, I'm underage. LOL. Jk.

Wadefrog: Eh, let's not go back tonight lah. We go overnight at Wadeboyboy's house.

Wadeboyboy: Cannot la bro... You see... (blah blah and gives stupid, lame excuses).

Wadefish: Wth man, I have to be back early then. We can't have a wild night. Or my mom will butcher me.

Wadeboyboy: Hmm... kla... Er, I think you guys can overnight at my place lah...

Wadefish: Deng!! Stupid la!! I packed my stuff edi but just now you say cannot I didn't bring. What am I gonna wear??

Wadefrog: Pinjam Wadeboyboy's lah...

Wadefish: Cannot lah... His one too small edi. LOL.

Wadecool: Eh, I found this good place with Wadeboyboy that day... near the bus station.. (goes into whispers).

And so, the night began. In preparation for stimulative activities later on, the Wades ate 6677 at a stall by the roadside. After filling up their blackholes, they proceeded to slay zombies for some warming up action. Then, they got on with the real deal.

Wadeboyboy rounded the streets of Yang Kalsom. Shadows lurking in dark corners could be seen beneath the shoplots. That was the prize. The fabled aquas. They were beautiful. Wadeboyboy pulled his bright red Ferrari up right next to the women. And so, the Wades were ensued in long, dirty talks with the aquas. One or two even recognised Wadeboyboy as their regular customer and asked:

Aqua: Ehh, you. Kenapa sudah sombong sekarang?

It was a breathtaking experience as the Wades even had minimal (I stress this word) contact with the aquas. A few hours later, the Wades felt no more steam in what they were doing. They decided it was enough for one night. Wadecool though, didn't seem to get enough. However, after much dispute and disagreement, they settled for beers in Polo Ground; with the exception of Wadefrog, who felt Coke alone could get him drunk.

It was about 5 in the morning. Morning joggers, mostly old folks, stared at the Wades who seemed to be drunk by now (but perfectly conscious). And they gave not a few looks of disgust at these seemingly troubled youth. Little did they know, the Wades are well disciplined, God-loving citizens of Wadeland. What's more, they couldn't recognise Wadefish, the founder of Wadeland, in that dim glow...

After settling the beers, the Wades decided to vanquish the whisperings and stares of the old folks once and for all. So, they threw the beer bottles high and far up in the air (Wadeboyboy had a very bad throw; almost killing himself and the other Wades). Upon touching ground, the bottles smashed to pieces; the piercing sound of glass shattering broke through the night. The joggers jogged faster, murmurings ceased, for fear of their lives. The Wades could not help but laugh at the sight of the scurrying dogs, for they meant no harm at all.

The Wades, guilt conscious of threatening the old folks, decided to redeem their Wade-sin by doing something which they would never do under normal circumstances. And so, the wild night ended with a mild activity. The Wades ate dim sum; the favourite sport for old folks after a good morning jog!

To be continued...

Shadow Of The Day

Blogging comes upon me in waves. There was a period I was a blogging enthusiast. There was a period (and still having occasional periods) of blog-suicide contemplations. My soul, my spirit, speaks naught of the state in which I currently reside.

Nevertheless, after spitting out fireballs of posts without much meaning, my system is cleansed. Even so, the cleansing is temporal, for as much as sense lives in me, nonsense lives in me like a conficker worm in an external hard disk: it cannot be removed. (now for those more technical, of course the worm can be removed by formatting the external but putting it in equal terms would mean brainwashing me)

Thus, having said that, I proceed now with this post.

Of late, I feel like a ghost. Given, I would have chosen a word less spooky and with more elegance but sometimes, the basic term is the best expression of the mind. Eating is a routine, sleeping is unnecessary, living is labour. Under normal conditions, I eat in a no holds barred manner, to the point of abnormality. I have lost this passion. Eating is to me a duty. Each spoonful of stuff I put in my mouth is just because I have a responsibility to my body. To not let it wither. I love sleep, I still do and always will. But I find it becoming unnecessary and that I can do without pretty much of it. I can stay awake till 5am, sleep for near 5hours, and go the day without naps. I find it hard to sleep. It's like; fear of sleep. The human life is a labour. Don't get me wrong; Lord, I know I still have You. Yet, tis' so hard to live when living is a routine. I refuse to be a machine.

Stop these thoughts in me. Yet, as long as I live, my thoughts live with me. However, I figured out that my thoughts can be alive, but not living. And so, I shut my thoughts up in the prison of my mind, choosing to live each day with blankness and simplicity. And without living thoughts, I'm naught but flesh and bones. A physical body that I do not own, preserved by mere humanity. No, this is not a severe case of boredom, nor depression. Talk to me; you'd find me perfectly happy, normal, and myself. But yet, I ask this question:

Who am I?

My existence ceases with each passing moment. And I question, what is my existence? Why do I exist? Yes, I have heard much; so much, that the answer becomes the problem: it becomes routined. Therefore, I'm no longer seeking for the answer in your mind, one which you want to comfort me with. I'm seeking for something more. Something more than an answer..

Earth To Bella

Before anything else, I just want to wish Mom,

Happy Birthday!

But this is not a boring birthday shoutout post, don't worry. There is so much to blog, but so little space. So many words to type, but so little time. So much thoughts, but so difficult to express. So, take a ride with me.

Many of you must be wondering if Rubella killed me. Well, no. I'm alive, and probably more alive than before. Yes, for those still in the unknown, Rubella struck when I had my Raya break. Basically, it's a holiday gone wrong for me. The only few days in beautiful Ipoh had to be spent stuck in my room, reading Calvin and Hobbes (the only comfort I had). But who could I blame? It's I, who hugged my Rubella stricken friend in the first place and stole the disease from him. It's I, who refused the vaccination provided by my beloved university. In exchange for a healthier body, and a stronger immune system, I chose the road not taken.

The road of Rubella.

Well, in the few days I spent itching, groaning, and cursing Rubella, I could only say I learnt nothing but endurance. It was one of the most torturing diseases one could get. You feel hot, you feel cold, one right after the other. Your throat feels so dry that you need fluid all the time. You can't sleep at night because of the heat from your body and the cold air from the air-cond. Your body contradicts and you suffer the consequences. Not forgetting the lumps, which stiffen the neck and it's painful, for goodness sake. Well, the after-effects couldn't be less worst either. I had a post-viral arthritis syndrome, where all my joints (fingers, wrists, legs) are swollen and they are kinda painful, similar to that of arthritis; the only difference being its temporal nature. Of course, as the rashes subsided, there was the itch which caused me two sleepless nights and thwarted my attempts at catching some afternoon naps. And one of the post-Rubella effects that I'm still wallowing in is dried lips. So dry, that it bleeds for no reason in the morning. The bleeding stopped by the way.

Many of my friends laughed at me, because I was laughing and joking all the time about the Rubella outbreak in my university before this. Some of them laughed, because they felt that I was "stupid" enough to refuse vaccination. But I, I will have the last, and perhaps, the longest and loudest laugh. Because at the end of it, I can point a finger at all of you who have not been through what I have been through and say, I did it my way. I made it, I survived, without man made, artificial immunity, which weakens the body's immune system eventually. I will laugh because all of you laughed at my wisdom which you labelled stupidity. I will live longer than every single one of you. I will be doing your eulogy. Muahahaha.

Hello Blog, Goodbye Blog.

No, I'm not wearing a straight jacket. I'm fine, thank you.

Rubella, Rubella, go away. Come again another day.

=)

Hum Hallelujah

A picture speaks a thousand words. Or feelings.

I did not get the Sime Darby scholarship.

Once again, Scholarship won. To date, the score is 3-0.

It's time for a reality check, bro. What's wrong with you? The answer, you are not good enough. No, not even for a simple scholarship. You had everything ready, just the funding, and you screwed it up in the interview. Don't give interview-a-phobia as a lame excuse. You sucked, and you know it.

And while the 50 inside me rejoices that I'll be staying in Malaysia after all, the other 50 is killing me with derogatory words. Like the above. I keep asking the same question, Why? They were offering 20 places to overseas. 20. No, not 1 or 5. But 20. And I could lose out. I do not like losing. I hate losing. It makes me feel low. It makes me feel useless. It makes me feel that whatever I have achieved so far is of no value. I hate the inferior feeling I get when I lose.

It was 50-50 all the while. But I thought that if I don't get the scholarship, the 50 who rejoices would be the louder voice. I guess I'm wrong. Nothing, no one, is more important than my ambitions, my dreams, my aspirations. And therefore, the other 50 inside me is consciously puncturing my confidence now.

Maybe, it's time for new ambitions. It's time for new dreams. It's time for new aspirations. And it's all gonna be here, in my beloved Malaysia. God, I will swallow this with joy. And it's time I learn a lesson.

"God resists the proud,
But gives grace to the humble."

James 4:6

Shatter my confidence, Lord. Crush all my self-belief. Overwhelm my pride, my ego. For Your strength is made perfect in my weakness. Carry me to the lowest, for there will I learn.

And I will rise again.

The bowman could not release his arrow after all. Maybe it's time I try some sniping. Could at least kick some ass in COD4.

I'm no good, I'm no good, I'm no good.

"So Jesus said to him, "Why do you call Me good? No one is good but One, that is, God."

Luke 18:19

Thank you, brothers and sisters, for all the encouragement.

I value them, more than anything else.

I got through the Sime Darby assessment, and I'll be going for the final interview tomorrow.

Which way will I go?

What will it be?


Life is waiting for you
It's all messed up but we're alive
Life is waiting for you
It's all messed up but we'll survive

Our Lady Peace - Life

Bedshaped

An overview of the beautiful room I currently reside in.

E316.


The humble abode.


The rest.


The locker.


The desk.


The air-cond.


The hermit.

There. Sorry for the low quality photos. All taken with my laptop's integrated webcam.

From UM With Love

Dear all,

It's been one of the longest weeks in my life, but nevertheless, I survived the orientation.

Everything's fine here, the room's okay, my roomies are alright, and basically, I met many new friends. Language is a problem though because I don't speak Mandarin. Guess I have to adapt. Food's edible, though at times I have to swallow them. The orientation week sucks big time. I guess some people just don't grow up. But it's OVER. And life begins.

Bad news for the week as my grandmother had a stroke. She's stable now, but still under observation. Prayers are needed, thank you.

Have been nourishing myself with food and sleep after one week of "torture". Went to gramps and bro took me around abit for the food debt I owe my stomach. And when I say torture, please don't have in mind any kinds of Nazi-style punishment or the like. The torture in my case is more inclined towards mental torture, where they try to kill you with boredom.

Enough said bout the negatives. UM is a good place, with lots of monkey. We practically saw a live invasion by one of the monkeys into a room. Economics faculty is about 10-15 minutes walk everyday, so I guess I'll be fitter with time. And not forgetting, the babes =) Yea, don't be jealous. The population of male and female in my college is by a ratio of 1:3. HAHA. =) My timetable's cool too. Quite relaxed everyday, just a few hours of lecture and tutorial. On Fridays, the class is till 10 a.m., so it will be convenient for me to go back to Ipoh.

Oh well, I'm onlining using one of my newly met friend's friend's account. Still waiting for approval for my registration. Will be done in about a week, hopefully. These are some updates.

With love,

Clarence

Mixed Tape

I sat and pondered upon the results of the public university. It's been hellofarollercoasterride for me. 2006, God-given results, yet was stuck in Form6. They say that lightning doesn't strike twice.

I guess they were wrong.

Here I am, 2008. Stuck, without any scholarship offers. My innermost desire is overseas. I have everything ready, including a placement in two of the universities in UK. But I have failed to get any scholarships, except for one last hope - Sime Darby. Well, that hope looks as bleak as can be. No news so far, except one mail which told me I've got the interview and I've to confirm my acceptance of it.

Lord, where?

First choice - USM, Mass Comm. They gave me UM, Econs instead. I'm not utterly disappointed, downhearted. I'm just amazed at how inefficient the whole system can be. Take a look at these two links below which Chris sent to me.

http://www.malaysia-students.com/2006/05/updates-from-stpm-upu-front.html

http://www.malaysianbar.org.my/index2.php?option=com_content&do_pdf=1&id=14956

Again, I gratefully accept things which come my way. Everything is God-given, none of it of my own. Why should I fret? Why should I complain and count my woes? Lord, just show me what are Your plans for me. I've asked and I'm asking again that if it's Your will, so be it, whatever it may be. Anywhere You say, Lord.

This is the mixed tape of my life.

The rest is still unwritten.

Putera Gunung Lang : Kota Monyet Gatal

Al-kisah bermulanya pengembaraan 3 lelaki jati menuju ke gunung lagenda.

Jam 2.00 petang
Sebermulanya, Hang Choong, Hang Chang, dan Hang Koon bersetuju untuk berjumpa di kubu yang terbiar, dikenali sebagai Kota E.Gospel, pada 06 Jun 2008. Dalam perjalanan ke kubu, Hang Choong dan Hang Koon menemui rintangan yang hebat, mengakibatkan kedua-duanya tidak menepati masa yang ditetapkan. Sementara menunggu ketibaan sahabat-sahabatnya, Hang Chang terpaksa menghadapi 4-5 ekor musuh perempuan yang menyerangnya.

Jam 2.05 petang
Hang Chang berjaya menumpaskan musuh-musuhnya dengan ketibaan Hang Choong dan Hang Koon yang membawa keris. Ketiga-ketiga sahabat kemudiannya menaiki makhluk yang bernama Kelisa untuk memulakan pengembaraan. Dalam perlawanan sebermula tersebut, teramat banyaklah tenaga yang terhilang. Justeru, ketiga-tiga pahlawan memulakan pencarian makanan dalam menebus tenaga. Dalam perjalanan, mereka terjumpai rumah usang yang dipenuhi sarang labah-labah. Papan tanda yang tergantung bertulis - Kong Heng. Dalam keadaan yang terdesak, mereka memasuki rumah tersebut dan memenuhi jiwa mereka dengan makanan basi yang enak sama sekali.


Rumah usang Kong Heng


Makanan basi

Lebih kurang Jam 3.00 petang
Pengembaraan untuk mencari gunung lagenda bermula. Makhluk Kelisa yang kurang bertenaga akibat kenaikan harga ( RM1.92 - RM2.70 ) membawa ketiga-tiga sahabat ke kaki gunung tersebut. Di kaki gunung, seekor makhluk yang sedang menyelongkar timbunan sampah-sarap telah memberi arah jalan kepada ketiga-tiga sahabat tersebut.


Makhluk Gunung Lang

Untuk menyeberangi laut yang terbentang luas di hadapan mereka, Hang Choong, Hang Chang dan Hang Koon terpaksa mendayung sampan yang berlubang. Dengan segala tenaga yang diperolehi daripada makanan basi Kong Heng, mereka mendayung sedaya upaya dan akhirnya, berjaya menyeberangi dengan selamatnya laut yang dipenuhi dengan makhluk yang memakan daging manusia.


Rintangan laut luas


Makhluk yang memenuhi laut tersebut


Keletihan dalam mendayung sampan


Kegirangan akibat menghampiri matlamat

Setelah lebih kurang sejam mengembara Gunung Lang, ketiga-tiga sahabat tersebut gagal menjumpai Kota Monyet yang dikatakan mulia dan suci. Malahan, seekor monyet jua tidak kelihatan di seluruh tempat. Yang kedengaran cumalah laungan makhluk berkaki empat yang nyaring. Yang terlihat pula cumalah beberapa ekor makhluk yang berkeliaran. Dalam kebingungan, ketiga-tiga sahabat berani tersebut merayau-rayau, dengan harapan menemui Kota Monyet dalam lagenda tersebut.


Dalam pencarian kota lagenda

Setelah seketika, ketiga-tiga sahabat berputus-asa dan berasa amat pilu akibat kegagalan menemui Kota Monyet tersebut. Dalam kehampaan, mereka bersiap-sedia untuk melepaskan pencarian mereka dan pulang.


Muka kehampaan Hang Koon

Di pertengahan jalan pulang, mereka terkejut oleh peristiwa yang tidak terduga sama sekali. Selama ini, Kota Monyet tidak dijumpai akibat kuasa ajaib Gunung Lang yang menyebelungi kota tersebut daripada pandangan manusia. Hati yang ikhlas ketiga-tiga sahabat telah mengharukan kuasa Gunung Lang yang membuka pintu hati mereka untuk menemui Kota Monyet.


Kota Monyet dalam lagenda

Malangnya, masa telah mengubahkan segala-galanya. Monyet yang mendiami Kota Monyet tidak lagi suci seperti dahulu kala. Kini, monyet-monyet tersebut teramatlah gatal dan menyerang monyet-monyet betina tanpa kawalan. Disebabkan itu, Hang Choong terpaksa menghapuskan kaum monyet yang gatal ini dengan lembing warisan pusaka keluarganya.


Hang Choong dengan lembing

Walaupun Kota Monyet tidaklah seperti dahulu kala, namun kepuasan memenuhi hati ketiga-tiga sahabat kerana mereka berjaya mengharungi segala rintangan dalam usaha mencari kota tersebut. Hasil yang terbuah tidaklah seperti yang tersangka. Walaupun begitu, wujudlah keeratan dan kekariban antara ketiga-tiga sahabat tersebut, untuk selama-lamanya.


Hang Choong, Hang Koon, dan Hang Chang

Al-kisah tamatlah pengembaran 3 lelaki jati menuju ke gunung lagenda.

Berbanyak terima-kasih kepada Hang Chang, yang mencadangkan pengembaraan ke Gunung Lang ini, dan N73 yang menyumbang kepada gambar-gambar yang menarik di atas.

Long Road Out Of Eden

I never believed in the term "best friends", but as I draw near to the ending of a huge chapter in my life, I can't help but realised I'll soon be parting ways with few very significant people, who have helped me pull through in life. This post is dedicated to the 3 of you.

Kumara
In 1998, a chinese-indian coalition was formed. I met Kumara in St.Michael 2. He was seated next to me in class. At first, it was kinda weird, as I didnt really mix with friends from other races before. But after awhile, we became really close friends, which words cannot fully express. And the friendship went on to blossom into a beautiful relationship, in which we no longer regard each other as merely friends, but brothers. In Year 5, we remain close but Year 6 brought few different friends into my life, and the chasm between us grew a little. But fate has a funny way of dealing with things. In Form 1, we were again enrolled in the same class (1A8) and thus, further strengthening an already well-developed friendship. From there, our friendship was never broken, even though there were disagreements once in awhile. Kumara, thanks for always being my support. Without you, I would have been beaten by life's many obstacles along the way. You've always been a listener, one whom I can share everything with, and at the same time, have the trust and confidence that my secrets are safe with you. A gentle giant lies underneath your big, hairy, and fierce physical display. You've never let me down and you're one of the few people I can really count on. Thanks for being a brother to me. The scouting years we shared, classroom jokes, out-of-classroom fun, and everything we've done together will always be in my memory. Thank you, friend.

Yohanand
When we first met, I forgot how it was, but I think it was in a CF camp in Form 1. Back then, we weren't close at all. Until we reached Form 4. Being in a class we thought were full of nerds ( eventually we were proved wrong ), we sticked together as a team. And sharing some common interests such as football and music, we eventually developed into a more matured friendship than just classmates. Yo, thanks for everything man. Tho' I don't really share much of my personal stuff with you, but I believe there are different friends in one's life who play different roles. Kumara played the role of a listener, while you made the role of crazy, wacky, fun in the sun. Thanks for all the jokes, laughter, and smiles you've brought in my life. Without you, I would never have survived Form 4, 5, and definitely life in Form 6. You are one very talented person in many aspects and I respect you for that. Our jamming sessions, Sixth Form Night band performances, futsal sessions, jungle-trekking, PJ football sessions, ping pong partnership, Science One outings, and so much more will always be a part of me. Thank you, friend.

Adrian
One of the childhood friends I have, Adrian you are special. We met in Satu Merah, and from there, our friendship was a weird one. We argued, fight, and had many disagreements in primary school. Thank God that He brought us back together in Form 6. I regret the many years that we never keep in touch, because I lost the wonderful opportunity of spending time with you. But nevertheless, Adrian, I realised nothing has changed when we met again in USA4 - except you've grown real frigging tall. You were still that same friend whom I always bully, fight, scold, argue with and everything else that's bad. Many thanks to you for the classroom fun, the songs we shared, the "flowery" languages you taught me, your jokes and nonsense, and most importantly, our DotA sessions together, in Blueserver and in CC. I really enjoyed my time with you, be it playing computer games or just hanging round, or going for lunch. And seriously, I even consider fetching you to and fro as my privelege. Thanks alot my friend. I will miss you if you go to Canada. Together we're invincible.

And there, my friends, I conclude my tribute to the three of you. Dear friends, I do not know whether any of you will be reading this or not but nevertheless, every word here was written with deep conviction that it is nothing but the truth. To the rest of my friends, from here on, our paths separate like the roots of a huge tree, each in pursuit of our own dreams, but always remembering where we came from. It will be a long road out of Eden from here. The journey into the outside world, and the journey to our dreams will be a long, winding, and rough one, away from the comfort and beauty of our own Eden homes. But I believe strongly that each of you are tough men and women, people whom I know would never give up in any circumstances. All the best to you guys, and I will definitely miss your presence. I'll be going to Australia on the 9th. Hope that none of you have disappeared when I return. Adrian, Yo and Kumara, once again, thanks for the memories. In the back of my mind, I know its time to move on, because this is the life-circle of friends. Very soon each of us will have our own new close buddies, but I just hope and pray that the old will not be gone when the new comes. Just remember this - our time, moments and memories will never fade, as long as men can breathe or eyes can see.